He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize