why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Quick, to the slutcave!
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
