who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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