i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
