i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
