i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
The power of my boobs compel you
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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