I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
The struggles of a small town man whore
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
