Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I just found a bag of teeth...
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
