real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
home. puking in laundry basket.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize