the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
only you would photoshop your dick
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
