He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize