They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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