Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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