just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
