Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
