North Korea, Best Korea!
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
