I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
