Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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