I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
