Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize