dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
