we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
