Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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