i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
