thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
