Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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