Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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