never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
