I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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