Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
