Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
