new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
