What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize