They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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