The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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