I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
