and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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