If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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