and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
her vagine was all disorganized.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
