Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
