I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
