okay pat passed out under dana's car
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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