Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
