Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
We're like a lot better than the average bears
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize