new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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