i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
