Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
