This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize