just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Randomize
