but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
