may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
