Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Randomize
